A CONVERSATION -2-

I was among the group of formers who met with personnel secretary Colonel Mark Tillsley.  I understood that the purpose of the meeting was more a reconciliation of fellowship than recruitment; and the goal was to find a way to improve communication with former officers.  However, I honestly felt loved and appreciated after years of not being able to find my own niche in the Army’s divine ministry and precious fellowship.

I first met Mark Tillsley when he was a senior in high school.  Now he is a doctoral candidate whose dissertation focuses on the role of the corps officer.  He does this while working day and night to fill positions, care for officers, and establish standards and discipline.  During the weekend Mark was pleasant, personable, and impressively open.  He spoke for himself while being true to the Army.  For example, when speaking of “calling,” he stated that the organization should not use an individual’s declaration of calling as a pressure point for manipulation.  Also, he acknowledged that in view of the fact that the Army “celebrates when a person leaves another church to join us,” then its members should not question the character of a person who perceives a change in his or her own understanding of the personal call.

Each delegate to this meeting was free to express personal ouches, hurts, feelings, and successes.  We spoke of the “crisis” of leaving the ranks; the struggle to find a new identity; and of course the frenzy of seeking to survive socially, emotionally, and economically while negotiating a new social engagement.  Affective expression is part of emotional catharsis.  Experiencing and seeking to understand each other’s experiences and burdens—however briefly—was part of a healing process.  Mark bore burdens and asked for forgiveness as freely as he gave forgiveness and agreed to make right that which was in his power to change.

Many of us expressed having felt rejected, shunned, ostracized, or misunderstood following our departure from the ranks.  Mark asked us to recall that many of our active officer peers often were “consumed by the people in their spheres,” or overwhelmed with the burdens of their own ministries and the individuals who clamored for their attention; such that the omission of reaching out to us was less intentional than one might perceive.  However, then he said that the Army was taking steps to “add intentionality” to contact with former officers and ministry to persons who left the ranks.  He stated that in the case of pastoral care to active officers, in the past two years retired officers were sent to provide supportive rather than official contact with active officers and that this has at least provisionally shown a positive coefficient of correlation with officer retention.

There were many practical recommendations.  These included reassessing the tangible support offered to parting officers as well as improving pastoral care and emotional support.  These also included possible unpaid leave during times of crisis and a re-examination of the way in which married couples are treated during marital crisis.  The Army of course must balance the care of soldiers, corps centers, and communities with the needs of officers in crisis.

Bob Chase
satisfecho@aol.com