I am a sinner. A jerk who daily struggles with lust, pride, envy and
anger. What is worse is that I’m also a Pharisee. I follow strict laws of moral
conduct; I don’t drink, smoke, do drugs, gamble, swear, etc. and despite my
being raised to believe in the inherent goodness and equality of people I feel
this entitles me to look down on people. Waiting until marriage I look at
people who have premarital sex with equal parts contempt and envy. And yet…
this is who I am. This is who Jesus died for. This is who he loves, warts and
all, and is changing into a better person on a daily basis when I give him
control of my life. So the question I have for you is do you want me in your
church?
I know I am not alone in this struggle. I also know that when we look
down on other people it’s really us battling our own inner demons. The problem
is that when I go to church or converse with most of my friends they’re
presented with ‘Christian Darryn.’ With ‘Christian Darryn’ everything is
sunshine and lollipops all the time, nothing bad ever happens, and my faith is
never shaken. The only problem is he’s not real. I, like everyone who is being
honest with themselves, battle with hurts and hang ups and long for a place to
be honest and rest. This used to be called Church. Now it’s called therapy.
For those of you who don’t know Salvation Army history very well, it was
never intended to be a church. It was always a Christian organization, meant to
clean people up and set them on the right path toward God as they dealt with
the issues that plagued them. Initially it was believed that once the gamblers,
alcoholics, prostitutes, etc. began reforming their ways they would be welcome
back to their churches with open arms. What happened was that the doors were
slammed in their faces. So the founder William Booth started his own church. It
was filled with every type of untouchable he could find, very much like the
island of misfit toys. It reflected the first group of Jesus’ followers. People
from all different walks of life, current and former addicts, sinners all,
banding together to make sense of their life and the world. Now look at the
churches we go too.
Being welcoming is not just about homosexuality but sharing God’s message
to everyone who will listen, even if it makes you uncomfortable. It saddens me
to be seeing The Salvation Army dying, but in my short life I have seen that
gradual progression in my own denomination and other churches.
We’ve gone from winning souls for Christ to raising our kids in Sunday
School and hoping they will stick with it when they get older. Of course we
welcome everyone into our sanctuary as long as they are ‘church people.’ Those
who look, act, think, speak and smell the right way are welcomed happily, the rest
are tolerated. This is not an indictment of all churches, but too many have I
gone to where I would be uncomfortable taking friends. Too often have I heard
that drug and alcohol treatment clients would spook the horses as it were. Much
can be said of different worship styles and theology but ultimately people want
a place to come with their questions and burdens. A place to belong.
I’m thinking of a church. This is a very big church with a lot of people
in it. There is every race and colour here, intellectuals and the mentally ill.
There are unwed teenage mothers, prostitutes (both former and current),
families with children and people devoted to a life of celibacy. Men, women,
and everyone else comes here to worship. We have biblical scholars and people
who are 99% sure that there is no God but come to hear otherwise. The rich and
the poor, teatottlers and addicts, miserable and spiteful human beings and the
cheeriest fun-loving people you’d ever want to meet. Those who were born in the
Christian faith and those who have no idea what Good Friday even is.
Everyone is here for three reasons.
1. To support one another in love.
2. To work more on themselves and become better people.
3. To learn more about Jesus.
It is messy and chaotic and maddening and there are times we feel like we
are falling apart at the seams and yet God keeps us together. To live
authentically and see things truly, providing and protecting one another. Not a
‘gay church’ or a ‘straight’ church but just a place of peace that actively goes
out in the community and drags people in off of the street who want to come.
Have you seen this church? If so, let me know. I’ve been looking for it a long
time.
Galatians 3:28 says “There is neither Jew nor Gentile, neither slave nor
free, nor is there male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus.” The
path to salvation is narrow enough without our help, we need to get out and
talk to those people who make our skin crawl because that is what we were
commanded to do. Despite being generally perceived by friends as a loving and
kind person I do believe my judgemental attitude must have hindered someone’s
walk with God at one point or another. This makes me physically sick to my
stomach. I don’t have a monopoly on God or faith, and just because I don’t
agree with how someone lives their life it does not mean that I have any right
to sit in judgement or keep the redeeming message of Jesus from them. This will
be my daily prayer and I hope you will join me.





















