Following my resignation in 2006 I found employment with First Direct bank, part of the HSBC group. The respect, value and appreciation I encountered in this role was in stark contrast to my officership experience. In fact the differences began to emerge even before my first day at First Direct. It started on my final day of ministry at my corps appointment, I knew this was going to be a difficult day emotionally, but I thought that perhaps there would be a phone call or card from DHQ, a word of encouragement or appreciation –but nothing – the farewell meeting came and went, with some very kind words from a number of faithful people within the corps, but nothing from the Army hierachy.
Then the realisation dawned, I had moved into my own house a few days before my farewell, now I had given DHQ my new address and phone number, but DHQ were known for chaos, not organisation and anyway it would have had no time to go to the board! So I set off back to the quarters, perhaps somebody had called that morning, maybe a card had been posted after all. I opened the front door, there was post on the mat, in fact there was a handwritten envelope for me which looked like it may contain a card, not only that but there was an envelope for my wife also, we had not been forgotten after all!
I opened the card, it was indeed a very kind and thoughtful gesture, it was signed by the whole senior management team. The card was from First Direct welcoming me to my new role. I took home the 2nd envelope,the one addressed to my wife, it was confirmation of the start date for the academic course she was about to commence. I checked the phone, but no, there was nothing from the Army. However I knew there would be a phone call soon, indeed the phone call would be from the TC no less. You see on the Sunday before my farewell there was the Divisional Welcome meeting at my corps and the TC promised he would call me in three weeks time – I’m still waiting.
Well at least there would be the settlement cheque, after 16 years of officership I knew I would receive no pension from the Army, but there would be a pay off. Incidently my parents had done a similar length of service, but because they had done it at the end of their working life and therefore retired as officers, they got a payout which was double mine, as well as a pension and house for life.
The settlement cheque duly arrived, it was exactly half the amount I was expecting. I did not understand, what had happened? No one at DHQ could explain so the matter went to THQ. What had been decided, without any consultation with myself, was that I would be ‘Out of Appointment‘ for 6 months, therefore the rest of the settlement would not arrive until the end of the six month period! Fortunately I had not relied on this money, but the thought did cross my mind that if I had run away with one of the songsters they surely would have dismissed me on the spot and then I would have got all the cash immediately! But then again, if you had seen the songsters!!
After twelve months working at First Direct I had built up my business interests sufficently to go part time, after another twelve months I resigned in order to concentrate totally on building my own business. Then it really hit me, I was bombarded with cards, words of sincere appreciation from both my colleagues and the hierachy of the bank. One of the senior management team gave me his personal mobile number and said that if my business didn’t work out I only needed to give him a call and I could be assured of my job back. It was a genuine offer, but one I have not needed to take up.
I returned home from that final day at First Direct, I don’t know how I made that short drive, you see the tears were running down my face, I was valued, I was special, I was appreciated but what was the most upsetting part of the whole scenario was that it was a secular organisation which made me feel this way, which had helped me regain my confidence in life. I left sixteen years of officership feeling a failure, I left two years of secular employment feeling successful.
That’s not how it’s meant to be.
David Kendall - Former Officer UKT
Active Soldier, Bellshill Corps, Scotland
32 comments:
Thank you for sharing David.
Sadly this is a familiar story, when it comes to supporting our own the hieracy struggle with this.
I resigned in August and the following March (Officers Retreat) I received a card to say that I was missed!!!!! Did it take this long for them to realise I was no longer active or was it simply a formality, the latter I expect!!
Like yourself I have been warmly received into secular employment by genuine, caring people who cannot do enough to help and be supportive a far cry from an organisation whose ethos is:-
Heart to God and hand to man!!!
I love TSA but some of the people within have as there motto:-
Heart to climbing the ladder and failing to see the need.
I would encourage those in authority within TSA to get out of your office and go walk the streets, get out and meet the people (not just soldiers, adherents and friends), see life, see how people live, don't just sit in your cosy office but recognise what is going on and how people are struggling through the recession. Take an interest in those who are resigning for whatever reason, follow them up, show you care, make it your responsibility, don't expect that someone else will do it because chances are they won't!!
From one who knows the pain of rejection but thanks God that I have come through the rain.
Former
UKT
Thanks David, the gratitude expressed to me and my wife on resigning came from those who knew us best, the people we served day in, day out. They were the ones we prayed with when they hurt or celebrated, when children were ill, or a grandparent's memory was failing.
Sure a visit by a DHQ officer with flowers for my wife and a devotional book for me would have been a nice tribute, but...
Former USA Central
David, you are so right: 'That’s not how it’s meant to be.' and I am so very sorry that is the way it was for you and Barbara. David, I want you to know that from all those years ago when we were in your Mum's Corps Cadet's together right up until this present day, you are someone I admire, respect and thank God for. Thank you too for helping to make our move to Scotland so much easier.
GB and continue to use you real good!
Glad Ljungholm
Active UKT
David, this is the only "job" that I know of that there is shame in leaving. When I resigned I never heard from anyone. I was given a cake and a gift from the other officers that I served with (in a very large corps where we had five officers). The gift went into the rubbish as I was not impressed with their generosity (it is usually the thought that counts but there was little thought in this one). They gave me a stuffed toy that had been donated and had a large black X on its leg to indicate that it was damaged goods and was to be disposed of. I haven't thought of that for years but as I wrote it it brought me to tears. That is exactly how they must have saw me, damaged goods to be disposed of.
David,
Your story is all too familiar. Thank you so much for your service unto the Lord and the people that you served.
Blessings !
USA Former- Eastern Territory
David, I think the very existence of this fellowhsip proves that your story is all too familiar.
My father is a retired officer, and my mother is an active officer. I find it interesting that they are often telling me that 'so-and-so asked after you the other day' but no-one has ever contacted me directly. My parents always give people my details when they say they have been thinking about me - but not even an email. I suspect it's more pastoral care for my parents - to show that the leaders know how many children their active officers have.
I agree with you that secular society does pastoral care so much better than the church (a really sad endictment). There are a lot of training courses that are compulsory for secular leaders to attend that are modeled after church pastoral care courses. One of the key capabilities that secular leaders are often graded on is how effectively they impliment (what we would call) pastoral care policies etc. into their team. They realise the importance of maintaining staff - because it costs so much to recruit and train staff. And they realise that without staff, they would have no customers, and no business.
I think the church in general could really learn a lot from secular society.
Yours,
Former Australian East
When my parents left after many years of service to run the business my mother inherited, their DC said that they were "deserting". I was an officer for eleven years and left for health reasons - advised to do so by my doctor. Then I was told by an HQ officer "this behaviour seems to run in the family".
Former, Sweden
Dear Former, SWEDEN!
Please contact me at selmoscow@aol.com.
Tack, S Ljungholm
I don't mean to disrupt anyones pity party since I'm sure there are legitimate gripes by many formers toward HQ personnel and since I too have over the years come into contact with officers who've had the sensitivity of Nazi concentration camp commandants, but if people really think that it's all that much different in the corporate world from what goes on in the corporation of TSA you're ALL eventually headed for a big fat surprise!
Several times on my trek home from work in the last few years I've stopped at some globally well known brand name store or other in the far western suburbs of Chicago. Each time I did I would see well spoken educated men in their middle 50s who looked like they were once "valued" middle management types in corporate America now standing behind a cash register.
They didn't need to tell me their stories because I knew their stories---it's universal. As soon as they reached a certain age and salary level they were let go----or as they say in the U.K. ---made "redundant"(?)
Like any corporation TSA has its own corporate culture. Part of that culture is the "calling" thing---and not just a calling but a "calling" specifically to TSA and to officership. If one accepts the whole premise when they go in (and probably in many cases treated the formers before them the same way they are now complaining they're being treated as formers!)then one must expect that when they leave some of their nastier comrades are going to say some nasty things. Also, some people who aren't necessarily nasty but just never liked them much are going to make a snide remark here and there too. It's human nature and that's just the way cookie crumbles!
And if someone really is so screwed up in the head that they're worshipping a god who isn't God and thinks their god is going to get you, you have nothing to fear anyway. If you know you're right with God it really doesn't matter what someone else's idol thinks of you.
Btw, I still contend that the main reason for the declining numbers of officers in the west in both recruitment and retention is that people now join groups for a whole different set of reasons than they did years ago.
In third world countries where the training colleges are full and officers stay in for life in larger percentages it's because just like 100 years ago in the west people are living on a near subsistence level. Subconsciously they're trying to survive.
If in the course of their work a few of their higher needs are met to boot that's all good in well too.
But in the west people are now attracted to groups that meet their higher needs and when they don't feel particularly valued anymore they look for the exit signs.
If soomeone in the Army's leadership doesn't start addressing Maslow' Pyramid of Hierarchichal needs soon the same thing will eventually happen in the third world in the next 50-100 years and then the Army will be in really big trouble worldwide when it comes to officership recruitment and retention.
Oh well, that's my take on it.......
Daryl Lach
USA Central
Sounds as though at least 97.5 of us were given the same 'well done'!
Yes you can feel forgotten and not valued anywhere, even here.
Is the Blog group a different fellowship to the Facebook group? If so that would explain why I have felt forgotten and not valued, even as a Facebook FSAOF member, by not being included on what I presumed was a list of members on the right of the Blog page.
I do appreciate there can be over sights but to keep seeing people who were once colleagues added while I keep looking for my name to be added (and it not) is a bit upsetting. (Even seeing people added who may have heard of FSAOF through me.)
The fellowship members list is 'cut & pasted' directly from the FB page. Consequently, if you're not included please send me a note at selmoscow@aol.com .
Thanks and sorry to learn of the error...
vv
Thank you David for your candid comments. I experienced much of the same. My spouse didn't wish to be married any longer, so I found another position (to support myself and kids). He could then stay in officership, first as a Lt., then an employee running a center. I received a card from officer's councils with one note, "praying that you return to the Lord" and many others all praying for my salvation and repentence. Since my spouse stayed in officership, all assumed that I had committed some great sin. Soldiers were forbidden from contacting their former corps officer. After 18 years of service, I was given two weeks to vacate the quarters.
Just as you experienced, I received no separation grant for 6 months until my spouse woldn't accept a new appointment. Now, nearly five years later, I'm feeling better (especially since my former spouse was terminated) and have some Facebook contact with active officers. But I'm still feeling like the "sinner" for leaving...
USA West Former
I am so sorry that you have been treated this way and I want to apologise on behalf of those who wronged you in this way.
It must have been difficult for you that your then husband wanted to remain without you and he was allowed to even though he didnt want to remain married to you. I am so glad you made the decision to find alternative employment. I was in a similar position myself, it's not easy being a single parent, running the home, caring for children and working but this is the necessity to survive and provide for your families needs.
People are so narrow minded and I am sure they speak without thinking of the consequences or maybe they do and cannot simply help themselves.
I am glad to hear you are feeling better, it's hard I know and I am sure made easier by the fact that your ex has left officership.
I feel women/single parents suffer a raw deal, we are seen by senior officials as second class, they feel we can't work and bring up a family and can't do the job as well.
I pray God's blessing upon you and that God will continue to protect you and your family.
Thank you for sharing.
Blessings
Former
UK Territory
David,
I just praise God that inspite of the Army's dealings with you, he had it in mind to use your new colleagues. Praying your new business is doing well and that the family are well.
Andrew (& Tracy) Clark
Formers UKT
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