MUST WE LEAVE THE DEAR OLD FLAG?

I was, until very recently, an active officer. There have been some unfortunate turn of events for us here in our Territory in recent weeks. We had begun a very informal discussion with our Divisional Commander about trying to be creative in corps ministry, specifically with regards to offering to be tent-makers as well as work through some theological convictions about leadership. Our corps is in a poor urban area and was running at a major deficit, around £44,000 ($68,000.00) per year with an income of little more than £2000...and even that was very difficult to raise! We were offering to find outside employment to help offset budget burdens, but also seeking to pioneer ways for the future patterns of ministry, which may prove to be more sustainable in the long term. We were also trying to say that program based ministry in several post-Christendom inner city communities were not working, which we have proved in these last two years. The DC was willing to explore all this but we were very much aware that he himself was moving. It didn’t leave us with much hope.


We hastily felt at that time such concern that our main 'hope' in the situation was moving out, and having already spent so much energy and effort to raise funds, compromise on program issues and build an inner city corps with basically my wife, me and two soldiers, we felt at a complete loss. Our passion for the Lord and for the mission of the Army has not waned but we just could not see a way forward without becoming increasingly exhausted and frustrated by the whole experience. We could see so clearly what needed to happen for things so progress but feared there was just a lack of time and support to see things move on. We offered our resignation because we didn't know what else to do. It totally went against the grain of who we are.


After receiving our resignation letter, we spoke further with our DC who offered that we should write our vision for ministry down and send it to the Secretary for Personnel, who would be coming to see us the following week so that there might be some discussion. So that document, along with some convictions we were trying to work through were forwarded to him at THQ. In the documents, we offered how we could see things progress. The SP came to visit, however what followed was just so heart breaking. We found to our utter dismay that he had not, in fact come to talk about a way forward, but to conduct our exit interview. He said that he had spoken with a few people at THQ about our proposals and that they had said; 'nothing was available to us.' This broke our hearts...not just because they had nothing for us, but also because it felt as if the Army were just willing to let us walk away so easily without at least some discussion of the issues.


Having shared our heart and more than one or two tears, the SP conceded that he would go back to THQ and engage in more talks. A few days later, we received word asking if we would consider an appointment which would also leave us free to begin planting a corps organically in the community where we lived in, our 'spare time.' This is one of the suggestions we originally proposed, so we, of course, said yes without delay although all the while sad that there wasn’t much hope of changing things in the current appointment where we had spent so much time and effort expanding the ministry in difficult conditions. A week later, we took a week of furlough relieved that we were going to be able to continue to serve as officers in two roles that we felt were very possible and potentially very fruitful that would result in a double beneficial blessing to the Army.


We returned from furlough and the DC requested to come visit with an update wherein he shared that; “the board had met, however they had not agreed on the appointment they suggested, and that they had instead accepted our resignation.” I cannot describe in words very adequately how this has made us feel. God knows we love the Army, but it just hurts so much, especially when we had thought there was a way forward and that, in effect, our resignation was withdrawn in spite of us not having submitted any paperwork to that effect. We had simply assumed that our willingness to move forward was understood as willingness, certainly in the context of the level of certainty contained in the offer of the alternative appointment.


If we rescind our resignation, we are back to square one in this appointment...feeling pressure to find significant funds and build on a pattern that is unsustainable and which is taking more out of us that we can physically bear. It is not just finance however, we can’t plough our lives into a pattern of ministry that we don’t feel is sustainable in the long term. In spite of feeling that the acceptance of our resignation was rather hasty, especially without further discussion, we just don't know what our challenging it will accomplish and feel we have little option but to move on. The implications for our family are enormous...we are both in our early 30s, with two young children, and have led Salvation Army corps for close to 9 years. We worked for the Army before training so we have few other skills or workplace experience. Going straight to work in corps leadership from full time education at the age of 20 has meant we have no savings, and very little else in way of experience in the world of work.


Having said all that, we are not without hope. We believe that the hand of the Lord is upon us and has led us to this point. We simply must trust him for the next step. He is faithful, and he will do it.


TWO COVENANTED SERVANTS
(names on file)