Friday, May 5, 2017

The Church’s Dirty Little Secret

My Panic Attacks, My Mental Illness, And The Church’s Dirty Little Secret

The first time it happened I was standing on stage at Sandals.
We were in the theater at California Baptist University because the gym floors were being redone or something of the sort.
I had stood in front of this family every Sunday for at least 5 years.
Nothing was different.
Just another Sunday.
We were singing Charlie Hall’s Salvation.
It was the 2nd song of the set.
All of a sudden I felt my heart skip a beat.
Literally I felt it flutter.
WHAT WAS HAPPENING?
Then it happened again.
Everything started spinning.
My chest got tight.
I remember almost blacking out.
I put my guitar down and stumbled off stage.
The band kept playing and Nathan ran up to me with eyes wide open.
“I think I’m having a heart attack. Get a doctor please.”
They stopped the service and asked if there was a doctor in the room.
After 5 minutes with me he looked at me and said, and I’ll never forget it…
“Carlos you aren’t having a heart attack, you’re having a panic attack”
That was the sentence that began a LONG road for me.
A road littered with me not being able to leave the house for days at a time because I would start perspiring profusely and my heart would race out of control.
A road where I would scream at myself in the mirror and curse God for giving me this thorn.
A road where I would have to pull over driving and sit for an hour because my body would randomly go into terror mode.
That was 10 years ago.
Through counseling, medicine, and everything short of traveling see the Wiz at the end of the yellow brick road, I have gotten my panic and anxiety under the illusion of control.
The truth is that it pops up at the most inopportune of times.
And what used to be strictly panic and anxiety has morphed into it’s ugly cousin called depression.
Depression is newer for me but very similar.
The idea that I can’t control my mind and my body.
It’s all the same.
Zero Control and the fear of it overtaking you.
Over the weekend, after seeing twitter explode with opinions and thoughts on mental illness, my own struggle came pressing her face up against my conscious again.
3 years ago I told my friend Eric, “I can see why people commit suicide. I honestly can. Not because I am near that, but this last bout of depression was the first bout where the fear of the what was coming was greater than the fear of anything else.”
I’ve never been suicidal. Or at least I don’t think I have. I don’t even know what that really means. But I do know this…
I have prayed for God to take this away.
I have fasted for God to heal me of this.
And guess what.
I still have it.
Yesterday when I got to Crosspoint to lead worship I had to sit in the car for an extra 5 minutes and do breathing exercises to slow my heart rate down as it had been palpitating all morning.
Was it because I was nervous about leading worship?
No.
Was it because I was anxious about anything that was going on in my life?
No.
It.  Just.  Happens.
So let me dispel some common myths the church has when it comes to mental illness.
1. A person struggling with mental illness needs to have more faith.
My faith and my seretonin levels have nothing to do with each other.
2. A person struggling with mental illness should forgo medicine and pray harder.
You wouldn’t tell an asthmatic to pray harder during an asthma attack. You would tell them to suck on that inhaler.
Same thing.

3. A person struggling with mental illness can’t lead in ministry.
Read the Bible. It’s filled with cray ppl like me killing it for God.
Oh. And you are crazier than you think you are.
Listen…
It’s not easy.
I wish God would take it away.
I wish I could go more than 5 days without a day I don’t have a mild or major episode of anxiety or depression.
But as of now I can’t.
And the church needs to get over it and stare this dirty little secret in the face.
Because when they do…
It will unleash a whole army of Christians who, at the moment, feel like they don’t have enough faith to lead.

Tuesday, May 2, 2017

Christian Views gets him Expelled from Sheffield U


Anti-gay marriage social work student loses appeal against removal from course

Sheffield University stands by its decision to expel Felix Ngole from its social work masters course for anti-gay marriage Facebook post
by Luke Stevenson on April 8, 2016 in Fitness to practise, Students, Workforce

Felix Ngole, photo courtesy of Christian Concern

A social work student who posted anti-gay marriage views on Facebook has lost his appeal against being expelled from his course.

Felix Ngole, who was a second year social work masters student at Sheffield University, was excluded from the course in February after making a Facebook post in support of Kim Davis, a US county clerk who was jailed after refusing to give marriage licenses to same-sex couples.

Ngole said his views were a part of his Christian faith. He had also published quotes from Leviticus on his private Facebook account, which described homosexuality as an “abomination”.

The appeals office at Sheffield University said his social media posts were “inappropriate” in light of the professional conduct set by the Health and Care Professions Councils (HCPC).

He had been told he did not offer insight or reflection into the potential impact of his postings, or how the profession might be perceived as a result of what he posted.
Fitness-to-practise

In response, Ngole said it should not be a university’s decision to “arbitrarily ‘vet’ who should enter a chosen career” and that it should be up to the professional body to decide.

However, the university said this was a fitness-to-practice issue judged using the guidance all social workers are held to, and that he had not been excluded from studying at Sheffield, only from studying social work.

Ngole said: “I did not say that everyone has to agree with me. However, I was reported to the university for these views and they unilaterally decided to end my course. In so doing, they ended my training for my chosen vocation.

“All students would expect every professional body to have their own set of codes and practises when the time comes, and each student would decide whether they felt comfortable in applying to that profession, given those codes.”

He said he will take further action over the “legal questions” his case has raised, such as whether Christians with “traditional biblical and moral beliefs” can still enter professions like social work.

Split opinion

A spokesperson for Sheffield University said: “The committee came to its conclusions based on the professional standards of conduct, performance and ethics and guidance on conduct and ethics for students set out by the [HCPC].

“He now has the option to register on an alternative course of study at the University of Sheffield.”

The story split opinion among Community Care readers. Some argued his views were “not compatible with the job”, while others said his ability to be a social worker should have been tested on his behaviour in the profession rather than his thoughts.

Andrea Williams, barrister and founder of the Christian Legal Centre, which is supporting Ngole, said this is the first case of a Christian student being stopped from entering a vocation.

She added there was “no evidence” his biblical views would have negatively impacted his work.

“Mr Ngole has worked with those who identify as homosexual in the past and has always treated them with respect, never discriminating against them,” Williams said.

Return to Battle in Russia and Beyond; Foreword

FOREWORD 

Eighty years ago, in April 1937, The Salvation Army headquarters in Stockholm, Sweden published Commissioner Karl Larsson’s book, Ten Years in Russia. The book received wide attention and was reprinted in several editions. Disappointingly, it was never translated into the English language, which meant that its story never became known outside the Scandinavian countries. The Second World War placed obstacles in the way of many enterprises and the wider distribution of the book was presumably among them. 

Commissioner Karl Larsson was a strategist and possessed a work capacity and acumen without equal. Despite the Larsson’s demanding schedule as territorial leaders with a far-reaching travel agenda, he found time every week to write articles in the War Cry with a focus on making society more wholesome, and to write numerous books.

Now, with the publication of Sven Ljungholm’s book. Return to Battle in Russia and Beyond, a wide chasm is bridged dating from the early twentieth century pioneers to the present day. The fact that Sven Ljungholm’s grandparents, Brigadiers Otto and Gerda Ljungholm were among the Swedish officers who constituted the pioneer team, and that he was among those who re-planted the Salvation banner in Russia makes the book especially compelling, relevant and vibrant by the inclusion of familiar experience. He has, through his book, summarized the early pioneers’ struggle and amplified it by the inclusion of his own and his wife’s experiences when returning to re-establish the work (Volume Two). The summary he provides of the Army’s in-progress and Russian historical events and the concurrent political development offers a meaningful perspective for readers.

On a personal level I sensed a link to the pioneer work in my childhood when I heard my parents speak about their comrade soldier Captain Hulda Nord, who was a member of the early pioneering team. In my home hangs a simple, but treasured, painting depicting the Ural Mountains in Russia that the pioneer Salvationist gifted to my parents.

The book, which you the reader are now holding, depicts a thrilling and adventurous era of the Salvation Army’s history. It’s a story of love for the Russian people and the pioneers’ zeal to bring the Gospel message to the vast Russian empire.

It’s with pleasure that I commend this book and thank Sven Ljungholm who so skillfully interpreted this holy adventure. Through the research conducted, coupled with his zealous documentation, he has bequeathed The Salvation Army with one more treasured chapter in the church’s heroic history.

Sven Nilsson, Commissioner (R) Sweden

Sunday, April 30, 2017

Prelude on 'Lavenham' - Wellington Citadel Band


In June, 1880, the Army bonnet made its first collective appearance. The women cadets of that year all wore this newly designed head­gear at the silver wedding of William and Catherine Booth. Originally the bonnet was intended to protect its wearer both from the weather and any missile thrown by some angry opponent. Hence its strictly utilitarian design in contrast to its more decorative appearance nowadays. But what was first intended as a protection has now become a passport, for there are few places into which the wearer of an Army bonnet cannot venture on the Master's service.

Friday, April 28, 2017

Warren Ravenstock 1 Solid Foundations-

 "Foundations"                                             





Bible Reading.  Psalm 127:1. "Unless the Lord builds the house, they labour in vain who build it; unless the Lord guards the city, the watchman stays awake in vain"
I remember hearing part of this Scripture verse in The Salvation Army, Larsson and Gowans musical, "Take Over Bid":  'Unless the Lord builds the house, they labour in vain who build it'.   
It is important to always have firm or good foundations to build upon. Our beliefs are the foundation for our values and behaviours. Therefore, what we believe is of the utmost matter.
While reading Matthew 13, I realized it contained eight parables that Jesus taught not only to His disciples but also to the crowds.  Six of the parables begin with "The kingdom of heaven is like...." With Jesus’ arrival, the focus of the kingdom was about to change from Law to Grace, and He preached about it frequently.
The disciples approached Jesus and asked, “Why do you speak to the people in parables?”  He replied, Because the knowledge of the secrets of the kingdom of heaven has been given to you, but not to them.Whoever has will be given more, and they will have an abundance. Whoever does not have, even what they have will be taken from them. This is why I speak to them in parables,” (Matt. 13:11-13, NIV). Jesus quoted Isaiah’s prophecy (Isa. 6: 9-10) to the disciples to help them comprehend that not everyone would understand or accept the Word of God.  Twice Jesus said, "He who has ears to hear, let him hear"--once to the crowd (v9) and once to the disciples (v 43). For those of us who have embarked on this journey, we will sometimes discover that not all people are open to understand or to receive the news of the kingdom and the gift of salvation.  Furthermore, Although Jesus taught all His listeners, but only the disciples received explanations of the parables, because Christ was mentoring His disciples and helping them to lay a firm spiritual foundation. This would be necessary for them to build their faith and spread the Gospel while building the early Church.
You might ask the question, "How does this apply to us"? We sometimes seem to take for granted the truths given to us in scripture which were hidden from those before and of Jesus' day.   However, Christians are part of God’s kingdom; therefore, when we study Scripture we need to pray for understanding, which is vital to building a strong foundation for our spiritual growth and to enable us to disciple others.

Warren Ravenscroft
Former Salvation Army Officer
Australia

We Saw Love - The International Staff Songsters

Wednesday, April 26, 2017

WORRY IS A ROUNDABOUT THAT KEEPS YOU FROM THE ROAD TO JOY April 26, 2017








We live in an age of anxiety. Cultural pessimism is all the rage, both inside the church and out. In an anxious age, we are tempted not only to egregious and obvious transgressions, but to more “common sins” like complaining (which I’ve written about here) and, of course, worrying.

Worrying is a sign that we are meeting cultural challenges with fear, not faith. In his letter to the Philippians, Paul wrote:
Don’t worry about anything, but in everything, through prayer and petition with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus. (CSB)


Think of Paul’s instruction here as a warning to keep us off the wrong road. We’re in a race, Paul would say, and we must avoid the obstacle that might trip us up, or might keep us from the right lane and make us go the wrong direction. I imagine the apostle saying, “A lot of people on the race get off on the road to worry, but that’s the wrong way. They are getting sidetracked.” 


Instead of being known for running our race, we let our struggles and sins define us. We give in to worry.

What Worry Says
One of my co-workers, Michael Kelley, is a great writer, a good friend, and gifted leader. His oldest son battled leukemia for many years—a serious time of testing for his family. Michael has known hardship, so when he writes about worry, I sit up and take notice. This is someone who knows firsthand what pain and sorrow is, what it’s like to have more questions for God than answers, what it’s like to cry into your pillow at night because of your sorrow.

Here’s what Michael says about the power of a Christian who doesn’t succumb to worry and anxiety:
“When we live with a lack of anxiety about the future, even in those tightrope kind of times, we communicate the truth that our God is indeed worthy of our trust. We don’t fret over the future because He holds it in His hands. We don’t wring our hands in worry because we know He’s charting the course. That sort of confidence invites others into it…


Do you see the evangelistic appeal of that kind of confidence? In an age of anxiety, peace that surpasses all understanding becomes an evangelistic reinforcement. Peace is what makes us stand out.

Fellow worrywarts, do you realize 
what happens when we worry? We start to rehearse in our minds all of the possible scenarios of what could go wrong, of how bad things are, of what might happen in your church, or in your city, or to your kids and grandkids, or in Washington, D.C. (And in a hyper-connected world, we have more opportunities than ever to worry!) 
We walk through situations, we foresee bad things, and it just consumes us. But we won’t run our race well if we keep getting off the path and going in circles.

Worry as a Roundabout
Last year, when I visited England, I rented a large vehicle for our family and taught myself how to drive on the other side of the road, with the steering wheel on the opposite side of the car. Driving was a challenge. (I lost count of how many curbs I hit while I was there!)

But what was even worse were the roundabouts. The UK must frown on intersections, because time after time, I kept encountering roundabouts, with two and three lanes at once, and they go the opposite way from roundabouts here in the States. You make a wrong turn? Sudden death! Every time we would take a roundabout, I felt like saying, “Don’t mind the people honking, kids! It’s just me, trying to keep us ALIVE!” (The Battle for American Independence was worth it, if only for us having fewer roundabouts!)

I think of worry like roundabouts, except you never get off onto the right exit. You just keep circling and circling, and your trials keep honking at you. Worry is like a roundabout that will keep you from running the race the way God intends.

Pray Instead
So, don’t worry, Paul says. Instead, pray! Take those scenarios you keep rehearsing in your mind and say them to God. Replace worry with prayer.

I like how NT scholar, Lynn Cohick, puts it. She says:
“Worry is a signal that our gaze has shifted to the swirling clutter of events at our feet. We must lift our head and raise our eyes to the throne of God, the figure of Jesus present with us.”

Sin does not define us. Struggle does not define us. Our salvation in Jesus Christ is what defines us. Let’s not substitute joy in our eternal salvation with grumbling and worrying.