A God Orchestrated Reconciliation Experience

The word "reconciliation" brings to my mind an experience I had several years ago as my husband and I were entering into full time ministry with the SA, assigned to plant a corps in a developing area.  We were already employees with the Army, living in and paying rent on a property normally used as housing for employees who were new to the area.  It was obvious there had never been upgrades made to the house.  After years of tenant use and abuse, it was in a very dilapidated state.  However, being new to the work, and only renters, we didn’t feel entitled to ask for any improvements to be made.

A few years later, as we were leaving that division to launch into our new assignment as Envoys, we received a scathing letter from the newly appointed DC regarding the condition of the quarters we had just vacated, saying, among other things, that it was “uninhabitable” (ouch)!  The newly appointed corps officer, who we knew by reputation, respected, and looked forward to meeting, also joined in this accusation.  We had taken pains to ensure that the house was found in better condition when we left than when we first arrived.  Friends from the corps came to help us move and clean up, and attested to the fact that it was left spotless.  Unfortunately, there was little anyone could do about the condition due to age and normal wear and tear.  .  We learned later that plans were already in the process of being made to move new Lieutenants into the house, so in the end the house was renovated to standards that SA officers would find more acceptable.

Shortly after this painful parting from that division, I was selected as a delegate to an interdenominational Prayer Conference.  The speakers were all topnotch Christian leaders from all over the world.  The speaker who impressed me most was Nancy Lee DeMoss, who spoke of our need to forgive in order to obtain forgiveness, and to be used by God in our ministries.  A list was passed out comparing “Proud People” with “Broken People”, which we were given time to read and pray over.

We were then asked to move into circles of a dozen, in a room packed with hundreds of people.   There were a few other SA delegates in that crowd, and everyone quickly moved randomly around, seeking a group to join.  As the group of strangers around me began to gather together, I was glad to see a long time officer friend join our group. Just as the prayer session was about to begin, those who hadn’t yet found a group, did so.  I saw another officer join our group, and lo and behold, it was the same corps officer who had recently joined in those hurtful accusations against my husband and me, and who I had been harboring resentment against…what was God doing?  By the look of shock on the officer’s face, I saw he hadn’t been aware that I was in the group until that moment, but it was too late to do anything about it…the prayer session was starting.

Our groups were told to first pray individually, asking the Lord to examine our hearts and show us where we needed to be forgiven, and to whom we needed to show forgiveness.  All I could think of was No. 25 on the list that Nancy DeMoss gave us, which stated: 

“Proud People…wait for the other to come and ask forgiveness when there is a misunderstanding or conflict in relationships. 

Broken People…take the initiative to be reconciled when there is a misunderstanding or a conflict in relationships; they race to the cross; they see if they can get there first, no matter how wrong the other may have been.”

When we were then asked to pray together in our groups, I felt the presence of the Lord so strongly, urging me to pray.  Although I tried to fight it, I finally opened my mouth and prayed, first, thanking the Lord for bringing me to the conference to make me aware of my own brokenness and unforgiving spirit, which I had been unaware of.  

I then thanked Him for bringing into that group the person against whom I had been harboring resentment.  Before I could go on, all of a sudden that officer grabbed my hand and began praying, asking the Lord for forgiveness.  It was as if a dam had burst, so much came tumbling out, and I knew that officer hadn’t realized the situation he had stepped into when he first came onto that scene that caused us such hurt. 

When the prayer session broke up, we had a brief opportunity to converse and again make amends.  I felt as if a heavy weight had been lifted off my shoulders.  Everyone around us was pretty stunned, not really knowing what had just taken place…and nobody dared ask.  However, we knew it was a miracle that only God could have orchestrated, bringing people together in order to provide healing so His work could be accomplished…especially at the beginning of the new ventures the Lord had brought all of us to.  My husband was amazed when I told him what had happened, and it was a healing for him as well.  I cannot speak for the other officer, as we never saw each other again, but God taught me a lesson in reconciliation – to forgive even when I do not feel like it, or when the other person does not ask it of me.

“Merciful God, who didst send thy messengers the prophets to preach repentance and prepare the way for our salvation:  Give us grace to heed their warnings and forsake our sins, that we may greet with joy the coming of Jesus Christ our Redeemer, who livith and reigneth with thee and the Holy Spirit, one God, now and for ever.  Amen. (Book of Common Prayer, Second Sunday of Advent).”

(name on file)

Former Officer

USA West

Societal Reconciliation

One of the courses that I teach is Conflict Resolution. As students and I discuss the goals of conflict resolution, one common goal is that of restoring friendly relationships between parties – reconciliation. Students recognize that this goal applies to more than reconciliation between individuals, such as a wife and husband, or two friends. The goal of restoring friendly relationships applies equally to larger parties, such as between portions of a congregation or between segments of society. Reconciliation becomes particularly difficult when the parties have been engaged in a heated or prolonged conflict. Yet, it is also at this time that reconciliation becomes even more important.

One historically recent approach to encouraging reconciliation between larger segments of a society is the development of Truth and Reconciliation Commissions. These commissions work to reveal past wrongdoing by governments or other parties in a conflict, in hopes of resolving the conflict, and encouraging friendlier relationships between the parties. Although the Argentine National Commission for Forced Disappearances is regarded as one of the first commissions, likely the best known commission is the South African Truth and Reconciliation Commission, established after the end of apartheid by President Nelson Mandela and Archbishop Desmond Tutu. Commissions have existed or currently operate in approximately 12% of the countries of the world (see Wikipedia’s “Truth and Reconciliation Commissions” for a listing).

            

The general title of these commissions, Truth and Reconciliation Commissions, provides a perspective on reconciliation. Reconciliation is founded upon or begins with truth – the recognition that one or more parties in a conflict have injured other parties, in essence, that one or more parties have engaged in unjust actions - sinned - against another. If one party has not sinned against another, then there is no need for reconciliation. Two friends may disagree over an issue, even a contentious issue, and may or may not successfully resolve their disagreement (they may agree to disagree). However, disagreement is not sin – it is only when one friend goes a step further to sin against or injure the other (for example, by judging the other friend), that their relationship is damaged. Similarly, segments of society may disagree over a contentious issue (e.g., political freedoms or land reform); disagreement between segments of society is characteristic of any society. However, it is when one segment goes a step further to sin against or injure another segment (e.g., violently, by political repression, or by denial of particular freedoms), that their relationship (and the society as a whole) is damaged.

Reconciliation is often viewed as a spiritual issue, where we have sinned against and been forgiven by God (e.g., 2 Corinthians 5:11-21, Colossians 1:20-22). Reconciliation is also often viewed as a personal issue, where one individual is sinned against and forgives another (e.g., Matthew 5:23-26, Matthew 18:15-17). However, reconciliation is a social issue as well. To the degree that one segment of society injures another, either intentionally or through institutional biases (e.g., institutional sexism), members of the injured segment suffer disproportionately, and the fabric of that whole society is damaged. In Jesus’ claim that Christians are the light of the world (Matthew 5:14), he noted that, “a city on a hill cannot be hidden.” Cities are neither individuals nor spirits, they are (and contain) segments of a society. Jesus’ claim about a city on a hill is as much a claim about Christians as a group – as a segment of society - as it is about individual Christians. Christians have a calling to be peacemakers, not just with God or with individuals, but within society.
__________________________________

Steven Hayduk
Former Officer,  Canada and Bermuda

Professor of Psychology

Southern Wesleyan University

shayduk@swu.edu

RECONCILIATION: ' NOW COMPLETED'

2 Corinthians 5:16-20 (MSG) ^“ Because of this decision we don’t evaluate people by what they have or how they look. We looked at the Messiah that way once and got it all wrong, as you know. We certainly don’t look at him that way anymore. Now we look inside, and what we see is that anyone united with the Messiah gets a fresh start, is created new. The old life is gone; a new life burgeons! Look at it! All this comes from the God who settled the relationship between us and him, and then called us to settle our relationships with each other. God put the world square with himself through the Messiah, giving the world a fresh start by offering forgiveness of sins. God has given us the task of telling everyone what he is doing. We’re Christ’s representatives. God uses us to persuade men and women to drop their differences and enter into God’s work of making things right between them. We’re speaking for Christ himself now: Become friends with God; he’s already a friend with you.”

·      “All this comes from the God who settled the relationship between us and him, and then called us to settle our relationships with each other.”

What a wonderful message from God through Christ, to the world through us, when we are united with the Messiah!  The challenge of reconciliation, making things right, is not a challenge that sends us out alone because it is clear, we cannot “fix things”, or “make it right” by ourselves.  It doesn’t matter to God what talents, riches, skills, oratory gifts, or University degrees we hold.  It doesn’t matter to God how we look, how beautiful we are, the color of our skin, the shape or color of our eyes, the length or style of our hair, the price or value of our clothes or the jewelry we wear.

What, you say?   But, we are good at fixing things, it’s what we do, it’s what makes us feel useful, needed, and successful!    Many of us pride ourselves when one of our gifts is that of “peacemaker”.  It is in our nature to want to fix things, to right the wrongs, to solve the problems, to find the answer, to make it better.  But it seems that is not our job!

·      God has given us the task of telling everyone what He is doing. We’re Christ’s representatives.

At this Christmas season, we witness all the unrest, killings, and hatred in our world; the war, rebellion, and deaths that pervade the news.   We sadly read the headlines, and watch the world of cell phones, with their daily videos streaming confusion, unrest, and struggles all over this world. 

At this Christmas Season and every other day, God’s relationship between us and Him has been settled, and our challenge is to share His message of peace, persuade people to drop our differences and accept God’s Son as Savior from our sins, to be “created new”. 

What would our world look like, what would the headlines report; what would the world of cell phones be streaming in real time if we all “dropped our differences”,  and accepted God’s message of peace?  God’s work, our challenge!  It seems almost impossible, all too simple.

God put the world square with himself through the Messiah, giving the world a fresh start by offering forgiveness of sins.

My grandfather’s career was that of a section foreman for the Railroad in New Mexico.  That was what he did until he retired.  But my grandfather was also a carpenter.  He made things with his hands.  He took pieces of wood and created from a block of wood items of beauty.  One of the things my grandfather made for each of his children was a baby crib.  These cribs were passed down from mother to daughter for their children.   I don’t know where he got the design, and I have never seen any quite like the ones he made.  He gave them to his children so his grandchildren could be placed in a crib that was built with love; that would be a safe, soft place for his grandbabies to sleep and grow.  He knew the importance of things he made being “square”. The pieces had to fit perfectly for the item to be whole, to serve the purpose for which it was intended.  It had to be made square. 

Paul reminds us that “God put the world square with Himself through the Messiah.”    God brought reconciliation to the world through His Son.  Jesus came that we might have life everlasting. 

John 3:16 (MSG) “This is how much God loved the world: He gave His Son, His one and only Son. And this is why: so that no one need be destroyed; by believing in Him, anyone can have a whole and lasting life. God didn’t go to all the trouble of sending His Son merely to point an accusing finger, telling the world how bad it was. He came to help, to put the world right again.”

Paul reminds us that God brings reconciliation to the world through His Son.  We are all God’s children, and as we pause to celebrate the birth of His Son, Jesus Christ, may our lives be a reflection of His relationship to us and our relationship to each other.  May we all speak the message of love, peace and reconciliation to a world that is so torn by division and ongoing strife.

            

   THE PATH TAKEN

God’s Son, so quiet in a manger lay,

His bed was softened by new mown hay;

His bright eyes searched His world so new;

The sights and sounds came rushing through!

The faces of those who gazed at him,

So strange, expressions of awe on them;

He was so small; how could he ever know,

The world in which he would quickly grow!

And, yes there were others born that day,

Their lives would travel in a different way;

Some soldiers, some just traveling that street,

When Jesus faced death, their paths would meet!

For all He would suffer, for all He would die,

Those then, us now, and all yet to pass by;

God set His path, reconciliation was now done,

The Father, The Son, The Holy Spirit became one.

Iva Lou Samples, 

Former SA Officer

USA South

RECONCILING: Corps and Headquarters Part 2 0f 2

For many Officers the appointment to DHQ or THQ is a blessing, but for others it is a curse. This may sound negative, but the fact is that most Officers want to fulfill their calling to save souls, grow saints and serve suffering humanity. I don’t believe any Officers were called for the purpose of frustrating their colleagues on the front line, nor were they called to upset headquarters staff. Nevertheless, there is a frustration building that I believe often happens because people end up in places they weren’t called to, perhaps without the necessary skills or resources.

In the same way that Corps Officers feel frustrated there will be headquarters staff frustrated by their own lack of support. With the average age of those entering training increasing over the past decades, the Army needs to acknowledge the experience and knowledge of its Officers gained in previous professional positions. Its Officers would become far more valuable assets if this knowledge informed the resourcing of the mission.


Corps Officership is hard work! Anecdotally, it appears that the attitude of Corps members is increasingly shifting towards ‘it’s the Officer’s job.’ With a substantial increase in administration over the past decade the role of the Corps Officer has developed into that of a spiritual civil servant. Smaller and older congregations perpetuate this problem, with many being unable or unwilling to take on committed roles in the Corps. This is manifest through increased pressure on Corps Officers that is not necessarily understood by headquarters staff. 

Legislation has, in recent years, changed the priorities of DHQs towards micro-bureaucracies, wrapped up in health & safety, legionella, child protection and finance. Rather than establishing a highly effective systems approach, the Army appears to have pursued a labour intensive strategy, making Officership less vocation and more administration – or less like ministry and more like a normal low paid job. This has to change! And change can only happen if the relationships are strong.

It may be Biblical to suggest that suffering is an integral part of human existence, but this needs to be balanced. 1 Peter 5 says, ‘and after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you.’ Officers of all ranks and appointments need to be restored and strengthened. The need for refreshment sometimes goes beyond divisional retreats, territorial councils and Brengle Institues, and the Army would benefit significantly from occasionally releasing the pressure on its Officers. I believe that sabbaticals, for example, are only open to Officers who have served over ten (or more) years. The work-life balance is becoming more important for people in full-time ministry, and this is evidenced by the number of Officers resigning or suffering work-related illness during the first few years of ministry.



I was shocked to discover, after resigning, that the Corps I had been appointed to had lost over 40 Officers to resignation, long term illness or requests for an early move, in just 120 years of its existence. This is an example of long-term relationship breakdown that can only be resolved in a culture of love, grace and reconciliation.

Finally, whilst people do not enter Officership for financial gain, there is a need for valuing Officers in the context of their ministry. I have heard many apologists for the Army say that the overall package is considerable, but typically (still) Officers are paid significantly less that their contemporaries in other denominations. I believe that this, along with feeling unsupported and unvalued, causes the Army to be built on weak foundations, and is evidenced by the number of Officers resigning and the lack of Cadets in training worldwide.

The Culture Outside 

‘Go your way; behold, I am sending you out as lambs in the midst of wolves.’

There is no doubt that the context in which the Army works is constantly changing towards a secular society. In Britain, for example, ‘the number of residents who stated that their religion was Christian in 2011 was fewer than in 2001. The size of this group decreased 13 percentage points to 59% (33.2 million) in 2011 from 72% (37.3 million) in 2001. It is the only group to have experienced a decrease in numbers between 2001 and 2011 despite population growth. The second largest response category in 2011 was no religion. This increased 10 percentage points.’ (2011 Census) 

The Salvation Army has always been, in my opinion, an adaptable innovator and now is the real test of whether it can be as relevant to the culture today as it was when it began in the 19^th century. This will require some tough decision making to allow appropriately gifted Officers the opportunity to innovate the mission of the Army in such a way that it is faithful to its calling and relevant to 21^st century society. The basic message of salvation has not changed, but the way in which it is communicated must change constantly in step with the culture.

Conclusion

The opening point about culture and strategy is of key importance. It seems that Corps and Headquarters are pursuing different strategies within vastly different Army sub-cultures. Whilst there is a refreshingly clear vision from the General – One Army, One Mission, One Message – the whole Army, from the tiniest outpost to the largest headquarters, needs to embrace this vision with a spirit of unity. This means reconciling differences and rebuilding relationships to allow a powerful culture of single-minded, soul-saving, saint-growing, humanity-serving to emerge.

We all know that the harvest is plentiful and that the labourers are few, which is why reconciliation is critical to the Army’s future mission. An Army that is expending energy and resources on friendly fire is not an Army that will win the war.

So my message to the Army is ‘reconciliation, reconciliation, reconciliation’ as the only way to secure a growing mission for the future.

Stuart Rivers


Former Officer at Aldershot Corps, UK